In 1998, Lifetime aired the movie starring Kirsten Dunst. She playes soon-to-be fifteen-year-old Tina. Tina's parents had recently separated due to her father's infidelity when Tina decided to have sex with her sixteen-year-old boyfriend. Ray, for the first time. They do not use protection because Tina feels that it is a sin to have sex and having a condom means that she was planning on stinning. The next time they are together, Ray wants to "take a break" due to football season. When she asks what about them being together forever, he says July to October was long enough for him.
In a later scene, Tina and her mom are driving to school when the radio station begins talking about teenagers having sex and becoming pregnant. Her mom then turns to Tina and asks her if she knew any girls who were having sex. (The watcher is lead to believe this is their first conversation about sex.) Tina nods her head yes gets out of the car.
Tina's fifteenth birthday arrives shortly after and Tina learns of her impending motherhood. Tina's parents have mixed reactions to the news. Her mother is a devout Catholic. She is angered but decides to "do the right thing" and support her daughter. Tina's father appears more accepting of the situation and is less upset by the news. Tina's younger brother and sister only think about what people will think about them; they show no concern for their sister.
Ray, the father, finally re-enters the picture Christmas day. Her mom sends him away without allowing Tina to speak to him.
At the early stages of her pregnancy, Tina spends more time with her friend Lori who had a baby at seventeen. She sees how difficult Lori's life is raising a child on her own. Because Tina has not had a chance to speak with Ray, she goes to his house to talk to him. He tells her that he'll help with the baby but they aren't going to get married. He reasons that he's not doing much with his life so he may as well have a kid, and it's good they're having them young so they won't be too old at the play ground. "The three of them can grow up together."
Tina experiences problems at school when the school wants to put Tina in a separate program for teen mothers. Her father argues with the principal that maybe they should teach students how to parent instead of the biology involved with getting pregnant.
As the pregnancy progresses Tina holds unrealistic expectations of what her future will be like. She learns she is having a boy. Tina brags to Lori about everything in her life. She says Ray wants to marry her and doesn't listen when Lori said her child's father said the same thing. In the next scene, we see Ray driving with another girl. At Tina's parenting class that night, Tina learns her pregnant friend's boyfriend broke up with her. They have a young mother speak about how her life is: no boyfriend, one friend, no sleep, no money, and a minimum wage job.
Ray claims to be working late and misses the parenting classes. Tina and Ray begin to fight about his lack of involvement. Ray accuses Tina of having sex with people before him because that is what everyone says about her. They break up soon after. However Tina holds hope that Ray will do right, especially when he tells her about what his mom bought for her shower. Tina is officially done with Ray when she sees him with his new girlfriend at the mall.
The day of Tina's shower arrives and no one shows, including Ray and his family. Afterwards Tina admits she is happy about the baby because she wanted something that was all hers. She wanted to feel love becuase she never felt love around her. She had sex with Ray in order to keep him. Tina's parents also have revelations and decide that they want to be together.
The birth of Tina's baby finally arrives, along with the previously absent Ray. He brings his new girlfriend and mother to the hospital. Tina's father does not allow him to enter the room and sends him to the waiting room. Tina delivers a healthy baby boy. The movie ends with Tina's entire family being reunited. She begins a narration about the uncertainty of her life and says how hard parenthood will be because she is still a kid.
1. Tina's mother did not talk to her about sex until she had already done it. Do you think religion play too big of a role in people's decisions to talk to their children about sex? How should religious parents discuss sex and religion with their children?
2. At school, Tina did not learn about the realities of being a young parent until she was already pregnant. Do you think schools should teach students about the realities of parenthood or leave the subject of parenthood to the parents?
3. Even though Tina's father was present in the household for fourteen years of her life, she dwelled on the absence of her father. She admits that was what lead her to have sex with Ray, in order to have love. What are your opinions on the prescence of fathers in the home? Does it really make such a strong impact on a child's life that they constantly seek love?
4. Tina had a friend who was a teenage mother. However she still had unprotected sex with Ray with no real thought about the consequences. Do you feel that friends of teen mothers are more likely to consistently use contreception? Or do they think that they still believe it won't happen to them?
5. After Tina had sex she only worried about being pregnant. She gave no thought about STDs that Ray could have passed to her. Do you feel that young people are only concerned with pregnancy? Does the risk of STDs take a backseat to pregnacy?
Sloane H.
1. I believe that religion should play a role in the way parents begin to talk to their children about sex. However, parents need to remember that the child/teen might not have the same religious beliefs as the parents. I honestly believe that the more perspectives that parents can bring into the “sex talk” the better. For example, a religious family can begin the discussion by explaining why the religion they belong to believes in abstinence, then talk about what to do if you aren’t being abstinent and follow up with consequences of bad decisions. I believe that the more informed and the more options teens have the better prepared they will be to make their own decisions.
ReplyDelete2. Personally I don’t think parenthood can be taught. I think that the life experiences a person has is what teaches them how to parent. Schools should encourage students to think about the difficulties that come with being a parent, particularly a teen parent, but I don’t think they should give parenting classes or anything like that.
3. I believe that you cannot blame your adult life on the way you were raised. Everyone has the opportunity to behave the way that they feel is appropriate. Sex is not the only way to express feelings of abandonment or fear. Tina could have became really close to her girlfriends, wrote in a journal, or joined school organizations. I understand that childhood shapes who you are, but you are still responsible for each decision that you make.
4. I think teens with friends who are mothers would make them LESS likely to use protection because they are going to be in a way desensitized to the subject of teen pregnancy and see that it is possible for teens to be parents.
5. I definitely believe that in the US STDs take a backseat to pregnancy because a lot of young teens are naïve and believe that if someone loves them or looks clean won’t have a disease. I think that is a problem because there is always the option of adoption but some infections you have for life and I don’t think teens realize that.
-Cheyane Frizzell
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ReplyDelete1. It appears to me that religious parents either talk to their teens about abstinence only or refrain from talking about sex at all. I believe that many of them think that since the bible says you need to wait until marriage for sex that their teens know that and will obey it. But whether it makes parents uncomfortable to talk about sex or they feel it is "taboo," they need to educate. Parents need to talk to their teens about the biology of it all, sex itself, abstinence, pregnancy, adoption, abortion, STDs, birth control, condoms, what to do if things don't go as planned, the whole shabang. Why would you want to leave your kid's health and education in the hands of someone else?
ReplyDelete2. I think high schools should offer a child development class because no matter when or if you decide to become a parent it is important to know about normal development. My high school offered this course and it involved parenting aspects as well. We had to take these fake babies home with us for a weekend and get up with them when they cried at night and whatnot to get a feel for the real thing. Personally, I did not enjoy it because I like to sleep, but I think it was a good idea and would be an asset at every school.
3. While an absent father can definitely create an added desire for love it is not the only situation that can bring this on. A supportive, nurturing, loving family is crucial for healthy psychological development though, there is no doubt about that. But it is definitely possible to trudge through family difficulties and psychological issues without getting pregnant. It seems to me that many girls get caught in an unhealthy relationship because they are overcome with feelings of low self-worth and insecurities. These feelings make girls more likely to submit to unsafe sexual behaviors, such as not using protection, which can lead to pregnancy. A lot of girls just want to love and be loved and sometimes when they get pregnant, they see the baby as a blessing for this reason. Personally, I think they could save themselves a lot of trouble and just get a dog.
4. I would assume that girls who see friends with children at a young age would take that situation to heart and learn from it, but I suppose it depends on the situation their friend is in. If their friend is happy and succeeding then one might not take any more precautions than they would have originally. But if their friend is struggling I would think they would look at the situation and say to themselves, "I don't want that," and take the necessary steps to prevent it.
5. I think STDs carry more weight and therefore people don't talk about them as much. People want to trust that their partner wouldn't put them at risk for a disease. People don't want to think that their partner had sexual relations with someone who was infected with a disease. People are too ashamed to get tested. People don't know how or where to get tested. People don't want to tell someone they have an STD because then they can't have sex with that person or they might have to use a condom. People are too uncomfortable talking about the situation. People are in denial that they may be infected so they avoid getting tested. There are all kinds of factors as to why people don't talk about STDs, but people need to understand that STDs happen and they can happen without having vaginal intercourse.
Alyssa K.
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ReplyDelete1. I think religion plays a huge role in peoples decision to talk to children about sex. Many parents are naïve and think that there is no way that their child would have sex. In a lot of catholic schools they don’t even bring up the topic of sex. Many children find out about sex by simply experimenting themselves. Catholic schools and religious parents need to properly educate their children about sex and contraceptives.
ReplyDelete2. I think it is vital for schools to teach about the realities of parenthood because a lot parents(especially religious parents) don’t discus the topic of sex with their children. Children need to learn from someone and I think schools are a good outlet.
3. I think the missing presence of a father has a big enough impact on a child during tough times. Tina was in need for love but no one was there to offer her that so she resorted to having sex with Ray, thinking that he would love her if they had sex. If her father was there I believe Tina wouldn’t have had sex with Ray
4. I would think that friends of teen mothers are likely to use contraceptives more because they would see how difficult it is to raise a child as a teenager. This would cause them to be more responsible during sex.
5. I think STD’s do in fact take a backseat to being pregnant because for the most part you can get rid of STD’s easily. You can terminate your pregnancy but some people may be pro-life and will not want to do that.
-Chris M
1.I believe, in certain families, that religion can blind parents from the reality that their kids are teens and will have impulsions. From a reasonably early age parents should talk to their kids about sex and the risks that come with sex. If religion plays a major role in the family then it should be incorporated in the discussion but not overrule all other options.
ReplyDelete2.I think it is very important for schools to teach students about sex and what happens if you do get pregnant. Sex education is something that I never had at my high school and often times felt uncomfortable asking my parents about. If students were taught at school, I believe they would be more inclined to talk to their parents about it. Although parenthood is something that can’t necessarily be learned through teachers preaching to you, I believe it would give kids an idea of what that experience would be like and how greatly it affects your life.
3.A father figure is something that is very important in a home. Although, I also believe that if a family is absent of a father, if the mother is a strong independent woman who can care for her children then she tends to take over both the roles of a mother and a father.
4. I believe that in most cases, teenagers tend to feel invincible and therefore think that it will never happen to them. Even if they have friends that have either had a serious scare or gotten pregnant they tend to make excuses and reasons to why their situations are different.
5. I think it is very true that STD's are rarely on the minds of teens when they are having sex. STD's are something that tend to be downplayed, especially when you know little about them. Teens focus a lot on image and "rank" in school so the fact that pregnancy is something that can be seen by everyone, it becomes the biggest and only risk of having sex.
Dorsey....
ReplyDelete1) In my opinion it does ,but if it was that big a deal to the parents they would understand that in this day and age sex is seen every where and a big deal. How would you discuss it I'm not sure ,but I feel it's a problem they should address head on if they want to prevent the circumstances of sex. Don't leave it up to someone else to tell your child about sex.
2) Parenthood is totally left up the the parents the school system just talks about the pros and cons of sex not what happens after a child is conceived. I think schools should also teach about what happens and how hard it is to raise a child as a teenager. I also think parents should talk about it as well.
3) Because you are a child and don't know much about the world a parents love and support are the first things you learn. When a father is absent in the home I feel you are missing a vital part of yourself. That sense of want and belonging begins to eat away at you. Then you begin looking for it in the wrong place. So I believe that the need for love form parents is very important.
4) I think they still believe that it wont happen to them but I also believe that girls with friends who have a child ore more prone to have babies and this i from a personal perspective.
5) I believe that STDs take the backseat to pregnancy because you often are able to see pregnant and not stds. So people generally take custom to what they see. With inventions like the pill, IUDs , and plan B pill a lot of people aren't worried about stds.